Uncomfortably Full

I can’t believe how full I am right now. I ate about three tbsp of pulled pork that I mashed up like baby food. Now I have a pain at the base of my throat. It has been an hour and a half and I still feel it. I tried to drink to get the food through my band quicker. Still nothing. Could it be that I do not need a fill? The doctor told me there is a little saline in the band from the surgery. Maybe that is enough. My first fill was supposed to be in two weeks but I couldn’t get an appointment until June 9th. That may be a good thing.

2 weeks post op

Today is two weeks post op and I went back to work today. I drive a school bus part time so I can be home for the kids when I need to be. I have been feeling great and ready to go back. Saturday was a little sketchy though. I worked the concession stand at the softball field. At first it was great. I worked the grill and fryer. Then, about 2 1/2 hours later I felt sick and there was a slight pain on my right side, around were the port is attached to the muscle.

So I was fine in the morning at work today. During the afternoon run I started to feel the same way I did Saturday. I think it was a combination of the bumpy ride and sitting for so long. I came home and had a sugar free popsicle and went off to softball practice. I walked around a little and relaxed and now I feel a little better.

I sure hope that this late in the day pain will stop soon. I really thought I would bounce right back from surgery. I guess it is another perk of pushing forty.

For the Love of Tuna

The PA said it was time to go to mushies. Yeah!!! I didn't realize how much I love tuna. Or could it be because I haven't had real food in so long. At first I just had a little tuna with lite mayo so it would not be dry. I added pepper and Italian seasoning for a little flavor. YUM.

Then I found these:I just had the Sun-Dried Tomato and Basil version. Yummy and very different. I must warn you, it does look like cat food when you open it so I plated it pretty with lettuce to make me feel better.

I tried to just eye two tablespoons but I think I did a little more because now I am a little stuffed. I need to scale it down a little next time. Oh, but is with worth it.

Panic Attacks and Forgetfulness

So let me start with a little background. Five years ago, when I was pregnant with my third daughter, I began to have panic attacks. It is the worst feeling that I have ever had. I went on medication and I was able to control them. Back in August of last year I thought I could live off the meds. I slowly weaned myself off of the meds and was doing okay. That was until my sleep study. I had my first full blown panic attack the first night off my sleep study and had to go home. I was fine after that until my surgery. After surgery, when I was waking up, I felt out of control and on the brink of another panic attack. I remember telling the nurse I felt like I was at the start of one and she asked if I was prone to them and asked why I didn’t have any meds listed. Well because I thought I could handle them with meds. Anyway, the pain meds helped ease the tension. They wheeled me into the other room and after a while when the drugs were wearing off I felt closer to a panic attack again. I was able to walk around and control it with the help of my husband. I finally got to go home. Being home and on pain meds I was okay for the week.

That brings us up to Monday. I decided not to take any pain medicine so I can go back to work soon. The pain was fine but again I started to be on the brink of a panic attack again. On Tuesday, I woke up and went into the bathroom where my husband was taking a shower and just lost it. I started crying because I was losing control. I ended up talking myself out of it and went downstairs and took one of my pain pills. It did help and I decided to keep myself busy and not to think about it. I went to the laundry room to throw a load in and kept hearing my husband come in and out. Finally he said “I love you” and I thought he left for good. And then I saw my 7 year old holding a dozen of roses and a card and she said “Happy Anniversary”. I can’t believe I totally forgot. Me, the wife. Isn’t the husband supposed to forget? Anyway, he gave me a hug and said don’t worry about it, he completely understands. I know he was chuckling all day that now he has one up on me. I can’t wait until he decides to use this in a future argument.

I went to the doctors for my post surgery appointment. The PA told me my body was under stress so that is the reason for my panic attacks. She told me to contact my PCP and get back on my meds. So I did and I don’t think I will ever go off them again.

15 lbs in a week

Can you believe it? I am down 15 pounds since my surgery. Well almost I think. I think I lost a couple more from my weigh in on Wed and surgery on Monday. It has not been a fun week. I have been living off of sugar free popsicles, sugar free jello, crystal light, and a little broth. At first it wasn't so bad because I wasn't hungry. The past two days I have been really hungry and going a little nuts because I just want to sit down to a big bowl of pasta. I have called the doctors office to see if I can start mushies and all they said was to refer to my dietitian's notes. Well thanks for all your help. So I went to my notes and it states that I can start my mushies on week three and I can't have real food until week five. It seems a little long to me. I am getting dizzy and very cranky and on the edge. My poor family.

Confessions

I finally broke down and told my husband the biggest secret that I have been keeping from him. I can't believe I did it. It is the only BIG secret that I have from him and now it is over. I told him how much I weighed. It was so hard for me to say. When I went in for surgery last Monday, the anesthesiologist asked how tall I was and how much I weighed; I had to write it down so my husband wouldn't hear. The other night he saw me typing on my blog while we were in bed and he saw the title "Shrinking Alesha". I asked what I was doing and told him none of his business. My husband works with computers all day. He is a network administrator and he knows his way around them pretty well. I new with a couple of clicks of the mouse he would find my blog and see how much I weighed. So alas I broke down and told him the nasty truth. Now for the reason I love my husband so much, he told me he thought I hovered around 220 at my highest. What a man I have.

Too Much Today

Today I hosted my middle daughter’s 7th birthday party at a bowling alley. I knew when I booked the party it would be pushing it a little. My only other choice was next weekend which is Mother’s Day weekend and, well, I wanted a few kids to show up anyway. So I brought my husband and my 16 year old to help and off we went. There was 11 kids total. I did not lift anything. I did not bowl. I just walked around and took picture and tried to keep the kids in order. Two hours later, I was in some serious pain. I took a pain killer before the party but I guess I just over did it. I went home and slept for a while but I am still sore. I hope I didn’t do anything to my band.